Talent Show, 2007

It's Monday morning and I can't begin to tell you how full my heart is. Favorites from last night are...well, really everybody. My personal most fun was directing Rod Gregory and the chorus in "This Child Is", the father/daughter duets were absolutely beautiful ("Remember Me" has just gone on my list to be sung at my funeral one day), Gillian---you made Chad cry with joy, the kids' dance was just downright perfect, Rhonda---your face at the end made all the effort worth it, and a special appreciation to the elders for allowing us to laugh (and laugh and laugh) at you. That, in itself, is a precious gift. I had no idea our talent pool was so extensive. The male quartet are the first ones I'm going to ask to be on our new C.D. !All the instrumentalists...Shanna, Karen, Don & Jerri, Doug & Mallory, Hayden!....were so inspiring! And all the soloists; Tim, Jennie, & Chris (Chris, I'm glad I let you in the show after all :) )---not only did you sing beautifully but from your heart. Each one of your songs reflected your life story and a window through which you let us peek inside. And to my dear friends who always are by my side, the Kerbys and the Lawrences. I don't think it would be possible to put on a production without you. Other familiar faces in tech; Dana & Melanie and well....just get a program and count up the hundred names that made last night possible. Never stop using your gifts, y'all. The day we stop expressing our innermost longings is the day we cease to be human.
The world needs you, never doubt that. Again, my heartfelt appreciation.
Until next time, Darla

last weekend

You want to hear all the cool stuff you can do in Miami? Since I can't speak Spanish, it's probably not a good idea for me to live there, but the beach was great! Somehow (I'm a nonswimmer) I made it out to this sand bar where I was able to happily frolick about. Then one evening we watched a movie on the beach. They've opened up a outdoor big screen cinema where you bring your lawn chair and blanket. We watched "Enchanted", which is a perfect movie for that setting. Down on the Port of Miami we were also able to go up in a hot air balloon...where it was discovered that Caleb has a fear of heights, and then we went over to the "island of the rich & famous" on a boat so we could gawk at some mansions and stare at some celebrities while they were trying to have a peaceful weekend at their pool. Anyway, it was a fun weekend with the family. It's such a good feeling to see one's kids all grown up and still alive and basically healthy and self sufficient (more or less). What did you all do for Thanksgiving?

I am SO thankful...

I think I was supposed to go around today and videotape the staff stating what they're thankful for, and then have it shown in the Kid's Worship. It looks like it's not going to happen. It was a good idea, though.

I'll tell you what I'm thankful for. I'm thankful for this church. With all its many members periodically tugging this way or that, I'm thankful to have many members! Little cloisters of folks can be sweet and simplistic, but it can also be suffocating. I'm thankful for the discussions and the conversations. I've been in congregations before where the conversation wasn't even allowed! (kinda like communist China) I'm thankful for my job. Whether short or long lived, it feels good to be here. No, more than good. It feels critical. That's the word. For some reason, which may long remain unknown, I feel it is necessary I sit here in this cute little messy office right now. I'm turning down auditions and I don't even know why anymore. Oops, I digress.

OK, it's true, I'm thankful to be in northern Virginia. Even with the traffic. After nine years of commuting 56 miles one way on Sundays, it's still amazing to be to be able to "run over to church". I remember at times being in tears, stuck on the Woodrow Wilson Bridge, trying to get four teenagers over here by 6:00 for a weekend retreat. It was always this great desperate spiritual sojourn trying to reach the mecca known as FXCC.

Don't ever take this place for granted. I love FXCC. And I am very thankful for it.

Budget planning

So anyway, it's that time of the year when we look ahead to the next year and try to figure out how much money we'll need to do the projects we've either already done, or would like to try in the future. Everything is to be looked through the lens of our new Vision statement, which makes sense, and framed under one of the five components listed under "being God's Heart to this community". And then for each category of ministry, we are to have as a heading our overarching philosophy or goal. In other words, Lisa has one for the children's ministry, Chris has one for the student ministry, etc. So it was this overarching goal phrase that caused me the most need to stop and think. What is to be the overarching goal of a worship ministry? To honor God as the center of our worship and invite others into His presence? Re-reading my first blog entry didn't really help me at all. Certainly there was nothing there that could be easily boiled down into one sentence. My daughter Brooke suggested, "to open the door of communication between the temporal world and the spiritual one." If nothing else, that phrase should open the door to communication amongst ourselves! How can worship be defined anyway? We choose to adore and praise a Creator who has chosen, for reasons unknown to me, to stay (for the most part and as far as I've personally experienced) audibly silent. So what is the job of a worship ministry? Obviously to try and facilitate participants into the process of honoring our Father...but more than that....I feel that it is somehow wrapped up in the fact of helping people REALLY believe what they say they believe. How different would we live and act if we REALLY thought God loved us as much as He does....and that He really DOES have our best interest at heart? Anyway, for part of my over-arching phrase, I came up with "to help make viscerally real God's message of redemption, grace, love, power, and purpose." I had already turned that in and THEN had a moment of panic when someone told me they thought "visceral" meant "superficial. Hopefully it means the opposite. Where is that dictionery?

Yes, Mom was surprised!

Wow....four kids, ten grandkids, two great grandkids, scores of church friends and neighbors! It was strange flying into Lexington a day early (my home town) and yet be "homeless". I wandered through Mom's neighborhood, but, of course, couldn't stop in yet. So, I went to the mall, had dinner with my best friend from 7th grade on, saw Amy Grant in concert at Centre College in Danville... it was a super day! At the mall everybody is called "honey", the clerks actually sincerely waited on me (and spoke an English I could understand!)...it all made me wonder if I should return to my roots. The "I'm-so-left-brained-I-might-tip-over-so-I-have-to-make-sure-I'm-wrapped-way-too-tight" syndrome of northern Virginia is completely absent in central Kentucky. Then I was sitting there, analyzing the spiritual condition of family members...or at least what shows as far as their church affiliation. (In case you're wondering, I've always done this sort of analysis...it has nothing to do with the fact that I work at a church now.) Out of us four children raised as elders' kids, the one least likely now regularly attends a Church of Christ, one who was one of the most compliant growing up hasn't attended anywhere in years, and the other two do attend...but at such "different flavors" neither could stand to go to the other's congregation. Then, looking on to the next generation (grandkids): three attend Church of Christ (two are not adult yet), three attend another denomination, and eight do not regularly attend anywhere. I'm positive this will continue to fluctuate constantly as people continue on their spiritual journey, but it does give one pause to think.

Also, when looking at the statistics on the two Churches of Christ in Lexington, surprisingly the most traditional one is now slightly gaining on the more progressive one. It seems the progressive one is being ostracized by those seeking a more traditional Church of Christ home, yet it isn't "progressive" enough, (being located near the University of Kentucky) to be attractive to seekers, to whom the mandate of "accapella only" seems too different.

Then my best friend from my childhood and I got into a huge discussion of whether some are "called" or not, where are the specific scriptures for free will, etc. etc. I love those kinds of discussions....we've been doing this since we were twelve! (no wonder the others in the youth group thought we were weird! ha!) Anyway, it was just a great weekend! (But, yes, I'm happy to be back!)

The relationships that never deepen....

The relationships that never deepen,
The hurting people unknowingly ignored...
The prayers never uttered---
The noble thoughts never entertained.

(quotes from Sunday's sermon) I guess we need to tape the above to both our computer screen and television set, huh? As our society increasingly lives more inside a box than in a real world; life is indeed becoming too comfortable with little or no bonding to fellow human beings and no creativity on the horizon. Yes, I watch TV, too....so all this is self directed as well. I believe Bruce was referring to us becoming desensitized to images of starving children when he mentioned ignoring hurting people. In my mind, however, I saw spouses and brushed aside children sitting around a room, staring uncontrollably at a flickering screen. We don't have to go far to unknowingly ignore hurting people.

But on to a happier subject. I'm headed home this weekend to a birthday bash for my mom who is turning 80. It's top secret, which is why I'm blogging about it. :) I'm counting on the fact that my mom will not go near a computer---she long ago reasoned that anything having to do with a "mouse" can't be good. Mounds of family and friends will be there! Her best friend of 76 years is planning on coming. Can you imagine? Ah, Kentucky, land of scuttering crawdads down in Green River, hiding under crystalized rocks. I can't wait. There's a whole tribe of people, in the hills, who look just like me...still perplexed as to how to battle flaming frizzy hair and not knowing where the freckes end and the age spots begin. Personally, I'm from the big city of Lexington, which is why I can coexist on the east coast...but on days when the traffic jams are too confining and there's not enough air in the cubicle...I need to go back home. I can't wait!

the Zoe conference

So, anyway, I wrote the above on the plane on the way to Zoe. I thought it would be interesting if I wanted to adapt it much after that conference. For those of you who may not know, Zoe is a worship conference held every fall in Nashville. The word "Zoe" means spiritual life, and the accapella singing group releases their annual C.D. with the accompanying book...which always proves to be an invaluable resource of fresh material for the Churches of Christ across the nation. In addition, there are some great speakers: Brian McLaren, Mike Cope, and Randy Harris are the ones I got to hear. Now that almost two weeks have gone by, what tidbits do I still remember from their speeches? I remember Randy starting out by saying he almost cancelled many speaking engagements, including Zoe, because, as of last spring, he felt he had "lost his voice", and had nothing to say. As a college professor, he doesn't need to look for fresh material, he gets fresh faces every semester. But as a sought-after speaker, that's a different story. Apparently he spent much of the summer, hanging out at various monasteries in search of spiritual rejuvenation. Once he got stranded while the tide was coming in on a deserted island in Scotland. And what truth did he come away with? He felt God told him, "If you never preach another sermon, I won't love you any less." That almost seems counterproductive to our constant urging to get members in the church more involved, doesn't it? Yet it reminds me of the teachers who assure the students of their "A", and then say, "now what do you want to do with your time?" Take away the stress, so that one is free to rejuvenate, to rest, to create. Actually, that was the main message of the entire leadership portion of the conference: lots of emphasis on keeping a Sabbath, contemplative prayer, and planned moments of quiet in worship. They said people feeling uncomfortable with moments of quiet during worship service just proves that they really need it.
Well, phone's ringing....gotta go.

thoughts on worship

As a disclaimer: the thoughts below are simply one person's as to where I am today and in this time. I'm simply an assistant, but on the other hand, I am proud to be an assistant...and the below include observations from "leading from a second (or third) chair".

Worship

God asks us to worship Him. As mere mortals, we struggle to understand what this could mean. We scramble to guess at what plans and tactics could possibly please this Holy One, the Creator of all.

In our limited framework, we look first to what pleases us. Do we like gifts? Words of praise? Beloved traditions? Service? Time alone with out objects of adoration? The answer, of course, is yes. As a parent, I would welcome any of the above from my child.

Perhaps it is easier to say with surety what God does not want. The scriptures teach He does not want rote or meaningless ritual. He does not want to be a party to "ticket punching" or mindless routine. Sameness and bullet points and graphs may make some of us feel more in control, but is making humnas feel safe and comfortable the point of worshipping God? If so, then who is being pleased, and whom is seeking worship from whom.

If we listen carefully, we already know the answers to God pleasing worship. Listen. The Holy Spirit screams that God wants our first fruits and our best efforts. He wants us engaged; reflecting and learning. He welcomes our questions, our doubts, and our heartfelt emotions---even if they're not all positive. The Holy Spirit begs us to use our gifts. God never said we had to be opera singers or academy award winners. He made us what we are anyway....and planned which gifts to bestow on us long before we discovered them.

And on those days when our best attempts fail in the eyes of our fellow man...He still smiles.
And smiling means He's pleased.

Worship